As we speak is April Idiot's Day. In different phrases, the web is on excessive alert for pretend headlines. With cryptocurrencies, that intuition ought to be a year-round dedication.
The token beneath was not a prank. They launched on an actual blockchain, raised actual cash, and left with a really actual bag holder. Collectively, they’ll educate you extra about due diligence than any joke.
Token named after flatulence reaches $2.5 billion
Apparently the market lacked one thing critical to fund, so Fartcoin ($Fatcoin) was launched on Solana in October 2024. Its origin story is precisely what it appears like. An AI chatbot known as Reality Terminal, developed by researcher Andy Airey, has cracked a fart joke.
Followers determined it was value tokenizing.
Inside 3 months, $Fatcoin Market capitalization exceeded $1 billion. It reached that milestone sooner than Dogecoin (DOGE), which took eight years. Let's perceive that.
Flatulence token outperformed OG meme coin.
By January 19, 2025, $Fatcoin It peaked at $2.48 per token and was valued at $2.5 billion. Reality Terminal itself grew to become what some are calling the primary AI crypto billionaire. Marc Andreessen gave the bot $50,000 in Bitcoin (BTC).
As of April 2026, $Fatcoin The buying and selling worth is roughly $0.17 and the market capitalization is roughly $175 million. It is a 93% lower from the height. Hundreds of wallets presently maintain tokens named after bodily capabilities which have misplaced nearly all their worth. There isn’t a AI chatbot that may save them.
Nevertheless, essentially the most absurd fantasy is that Fatcoin remains to be the 183rd ranked cryptocurrency based mostly on market capitalization.
Developer loses $10 million in accident, costs soar
SLERF launched on Solana on March 18, 2024. We raised $10 million in pre-sale. What occurred subsequent belongs within the museum of human error.
An nameless developer by accident despatched your complete presale token allocation and liquidity pool tokens to the write handle. Gone. Ceaselessly. Mint privileges had already been revoked, so there was no “undo” button, no hotfix, no “Have you ever tried turning it on and off once more?” message.
“Guys, I tousled. I burned the LPs and tokens I had put aside for the airdrop. Mint privileges have already been taken away so I can't mint something. There's nothing I can do to repair this. I'm so sorry,” Slarfsol posted on X.
The builders posted this confession publicly and credit score the place it's required, however not less than they have been sincere about it.
That is the place the story will get actually absurd. As a substitute of crashing to zero, SLERF skyrocketed.
The sheer spectacle drew speculators like moths to a really costly flame. Inside 24 hours, buying and selling quantity reached $2.5 billion, briefly surpassing Ethereum (ETH) and USDC. Market capitalization peaked at $450 million. For tokens whose treasury has simply been incinerated.
By April 2026, SLERF might be buying and selling at roughly $0.003 and have a market cap of roughly $3 million. That's a 99.7% lower. The $10 million pre-sale funds stay completely deserted. Someplace in Solana, the write handle has the costliest typo in memecoin historical past.
A 13-year-old boy swiped a token in entrance of the digicam, however it was later noticed on the web.
On November 20, 2024, a youngster launched a token known as QUANT on Pump.enjoyable throughout a livestream. Eight minutes later, he dumped all of it for about $30,000.
I captured that second stay. The 13-year-old celebrated his earnings and switched off his digicam.
What occurred subsequent was each poetic and disturbing. The crypto group launched a “revenge pump” and purchased QUANT to particularly harass younger builders, pushing its market cap to $35 million inside hours. The irony was merciless.
If {the teenager} had merely held on, his inventory would have been value greater than $1 million. He selected $30,000 and the web mob as a substitute.
The aftermath spiraled. Neighborhood members recognized the boy and launched his residence handle and faculty. His mom obtained abusive messages on Instagram.
This child stole the coin for $30,000.
They tracked him down and located his college.
And he transferred his coin $QUANT to a market cap of $35 million, so the worth of his unique coin might be over $1 million 😳 pic.twitter.com/mVih7r1icj
— Crypto terminology (@Crypto_Jargon) November 20, 2024
Adults spent thousands and thousands of {dollars} on tokens created by kids and harassed them when the youngsters behaved precisely like them. QUANT is now nearly defunct, with no transactions recorded for over 29 days.
{The teenager} later issued an apology token. Nobody gained traction. In any case, forgiveness just isn’t fluid.
'The World's Most Trustworthy Cryptocurrency' Guarantees Nothing and Achieves $450 Million
If SLERF is an accident and QUANT is a rip-off, Ineffective (USELESS) is even rarer in cryptocurrencies. It was clear.
USELESS launched on Solana by way of LetsBONK.enjoyable in Could 2025 with a pitch that will make enterprise capitalists cry. There aren’t any roadmaps, no group assignments, no VC vesting, no ecosystem funds, and no public utilities. Your entire provide of 1 billion tokens was made obtainable from day one, and the Mint's authority was completely relinquished.
Unsurprisingly, the market beloved it. USELESS went from a market cap of $200,000 to $40 million in a single week. It has since fallen 87.5% to $5 million. After that, it recovered to $250 million in a single month. By October 2025, the market capitalization reached $450 million.
Coinbase, Kraken, and Gate.io all checklist it. Main exchanges have given shelf house to tokens that inform folks to their face that they received't do something. As of April 2026, USELESS maintains a market capitalization of roughly $32 million.
Right here's the twist. In contrast to most tokens on this checklist, USELESS didn’t lag pulls and was 99% uncollapsed. Token, which guarantees completely nothing, could have been essentially the most sincere venture on this total lineup.
Due diligence guidelines for daily, not simply April 1st.
These 4 initiatives share a sample that ought to concern anybody paying consideration. None supplied a working product, a trusted group with a public id, or a use case past hypothesis. However collectively they raised billions of {dollars}.
From January 2024 to March 2025, greater than 7 million tokens have been deployed on Pump.enjoyable alone. In keeping with DappRadar knowledge, 98.6% of people that have made not less than 5 trades find yourself in nugatory pump-and-dump schemes. The remaining 1.4% consists of $Fatcoin.
The lesson right here just isn’t that every one meme cash are scams. USELESS operated extra transparently than some tokens, together with a 50-page whitepaper. The lesson is {that a} lack of utility, accountability, and even primary seriousness does nothing to gradual the expansion of capital.
Now everybody double-checks headlines earlier than sharing them. Tomorrow, we'll principally be again to stealing tokens based mostly on Telegram screenshots. Right here's what it’s best to ask earlier than shopping for something.
Are you able to verify who made it? Is there a working product or only a web site and group chat? Are the sensible contracts audited by a good firm? What’s the distribution of the tokens? And do insiders maintain a disproportionate share? Does the ranking replicate utilization or simply the vibe?
SLERF's builders have been nervous. The creators of QUANT have been children who handled blockchain like a lemonade stand. $Fatcoin Born from AI bathroom humor. USELESS instructed everybody the reality and it paid off.
In every case, the data was proper there. The one query is, will anybody hassle to have a look at it earlier than clicking “purchase”?
